Most of my friends and I completely agree that we prefer our kids to grow up unplugged for a wide variety of reasons. Those friends of mine with kids in public school tell me of their children's constant begging for things like a DS, ipod, game station, whatever. I have felt quite lucky in that my girls didn't even know what most of those things were. Since our friends do not have them and when the girls did go to school they were at a Waldorf school so it was a non-issue for us.
Until... their cousins started getting them. The blessing of family is that they are not chosen, but assigned- so naturally more opportunities for acceptance are presented. They have observed that when their cousins use these things they become 'mean and grumpy.' And they do. The exposure has been rather short lived until now as we're living together in one apartment during these three months. So there's been lots of pop music, DS playing, and mp3 players hanging out of ears going on around them. What has not yet happened (yes, I realize I'm jinxing this by writing about it!) is them asking to participate. They just move away from their cousins when they become 'unavailable' to humans and choose to do something else. They sometimes will watch from over a shoulder but don't even ask to play- let alone to have their own.
Then the other day they came to me and told me they were playing 'teenagers' and had made themselves cel phones and laptops. I thought all of this was hilarious because I've never said anything about those things being for teenagers or that we don't use those things. And likely if I had given them the inclination that these things are 'wrong' or 'bad' they wouldn't have been inspired to make their own.
I'm very careful with my girls to not put judgments on the things we do not partake in because inevitably we will meet people that do use those things and them feeling like something is inherently bad about that does not feel good to me. We have particular family members that enjoy informing my girls about their own beliefs on a regular basis. They attend a church that indoctrinates the kids at a young age on how to judge others- you know, just like Christ did. Oh, wait... So anyway, from the time they were 2 years old they had quite a list going for my girls of reasons they were going to hell- anything from eating bacon to believing in fairies. I never wanted my girls to have that sort of superiority complex over others having to do with things like Barbie, DS things, or even attending school.
We were part of an unschooling group for a very short time when the girls were little and there were 4 year olds in there that could give a dissertation on the evils of public school. So much focus on what they've not chosen on the parents' part. I really don't get that. So, just don't go. My girls didn't know they didn't go to school until strangers started pointing it out to them and asking why they weren't in school. Then I would respond, "We homeschool. " I remember the one day when the older sister was nearly six and said, "We homeschool? What's that?" I said it means you don't go to school and she said, "Oh." That was the extent of our conversation about it. So later when given the option to go to school or not they both chose to go to a Waldorf school for a while and the older one is eager to return after our travels, while the little one says she'll never go back. But time will tell on that one!
