I'm always a bit surprised by how many people ask me, "What's a cooperative game?" when it comes up in the conversation. Cooperative games are games where all the players play towards a common goal to win the game, as opposed to a competitive game where players are opponents ending the game with one winner and the others as losers. I think many of us have had the experience of playing Chutes and Ladders with a child where the child is suddenly sent all the way back to the beginning of the board from near the top and bursts into tears. Even as an adult I would sometimes have a pretty strong reaction to being sent all the way back usually resulting in a silent curse against the stupid spinner or card. It feels so random and unfair- and really it is. I remember hating that feeling as a child and only feeling good about the game when I was the winner.
So what is it that makes us so competitive in this country? Why is it so hard for us to cooperate with each other. There are so many areas where we are taught that competition is 'healthy' and good for us. But is it? Capitalism is based on competition. But it is driven by fear. Fear of lack. Fear that someone else will have more, leaving me with less. Fear of not being on top. Fear of not winning. The very fear that creeps up when drawing a card during a game of Candy Land when that lollipop- or whatever is that sends you right back to the beginning. Many people say, "It's good for kids to learn how to deal with disappointment at an early age." and I've even seen parents scold their children when they're disappointed while playing one of these games and even punish them for crying, yelling at them and sending them into a time out. The whole scene seems rather absurd when the point of games is supposed to be FUN!
What if we all taught our children that 'winning' meant everyone getting what they want and not contingent upon someone else losing? What if our children considered their opponents happiness as much as their own. What if our children grew up celebrating another's 'win.' What if our children didn't see others as opponents at all, but partners in getting what they wanted -people they need to work with rather than against. What a world it would be.
For the holidays this year please consider giving the gift of a cooperative game rather than an competitive game. There are lots to choose from at
our Amazon store that are definitely worth checking out. Not surprisingly, many are made in Canada.